|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
True story: A few years back I was working with a client who had recently moved to Los Angeles. She was single, did not know many people in the big city, and felt a little lonely. I innocently suggested she give online dating a shot. It seemed like an easy and pressure-free way to meet people, and I had other clients who enjoyed their experience and were in good relationships as a result.
"What kind of desperate person do you think I am?!?" she snapped.
She apologized, but explained that she felt "weird" about online dating. This perked my curiosity, so later I asked some of my other clients if they ever tried it. Some only confessed after their faces turned three shades of crimson. Since I am a strong proponent of online dating, I dispel any stigma or embarrassment when I recommend it to my clients. This is what I tell them:
For many singles, life moves like Richard Petty around the Talladega Speedway. We change jobs every few years. We relocate more frequently. We cannot remember the last time we answered a phone with a cord. Even if time is not the issue, some single people cannot shake the feeling that everyone else is happy while they are always alone. We may look at online dating as an act of desperation, because "normal people don't need something like that."
The simple fact is that you are not weird if you use an online dating service. We only feel weird when we think we are doing something outside the norm. Consider this: over 40 million people in the US access online dating websites every month. It is the fastest growing sector of online content. There is no reason to feel embarrassed, because if you date online you are actually part of a huge group.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone special, or at the very least make some new friends, so why not use every resource available to you? You do not get extra points for meeting someone in a bar or while waiting for dry socks at the Laundromat. Does it matter to you how you met the important people already in your life? You probably barely even think about it.
By setting up a personal profile and a list of likes and dislikes, you invest time in yourself. More importantly, you are taking action by trying to improve yourself and your situation. You are putting yourself out there and taking control by refusing to be lonely and isolated.
I have found many advantages to the Internet. The anonymity of online dating allows you to roll out of bed, hair standing in ten different directions, breath smelling like Boston Harbor at low tide ? then click! You stumble on a person you will be dating in a few weeks. The cost compared to going out and searching is next to nothing. You can learn more about a person's interests to see if they mesh with yours. You do not have to deal with the harshness of rejection in person. You have a huge pool of people to explore (remember, 40 million!) from all walks-of-life, people you would never have the chance to meet within your neighborhood or small circle of friends.
There is also fraud and deception. You will probably come across a photo that looks eerily like Pamela Anderson ? right down to the copyright in the lower corner. Clients tell me about married people posing as single. Nevertheless, these issues of honesty exist both on and off-line, so do not let that stop you from finding the partner you want.
With 43% of the U.S. population being single and with so many single clients asking me about Internet dating, I began to put a guide together to help my clients use this service effectively and safely and avoid these pitfalls. I want everyone to find the happiness they deserve and want to make this Tool book available to everyone for Free! To get your free E-Book, "Tools To Internet Dating" go to TheRelationshipTools.com and get your copy today.
Don't be ashamed or afraid, learn the best and safest way to use the Internet to take control of your life and find the person you deserve!
About The Author
Devlyn Steele ("America's Leading Life-Coach") has been a public consultant and a private counselor for over 15 years. A Cognitive Therapist, Radio host and Columnist, Devlyn also developed ToolsToLife.com. Devlyn maintains a thriving practice in Hollywood, where he counsels famous actors, musicians and captains of industry. Soon his new book will be available, Relationship Tools. You can hear Coach Steele live every Tuesday on LoveBeat Radio 1310 KXAM.com 7-9 PM. Arizona Time



Have you been looking for romantic and provocative ways to... Read More
It begins with you, and your attitude. There are a... Read More
As a single male trying to enter into the lifestyle... Read More
Creating your online dating profile is an aspect often commonly... Read More
I'm often surprised by the number of people who are... Read More
Chances are that you have had a wide variety of... Read More
At first dating is fun but as you go on... Read More
Has dating unknowingly become just a habit to you? Becoming... Read More
Imagine the joy of finding the love of your life,... Read More
Online dating is a great way to contact and meet... Read More
So you're single. And you don't want to be single... Read More
Internet dating services are popping up online like dandelions in... Read More
Before you pick up the phone to make reservations for... Read More
I don't know if the craze of SMS has caught... Read More
The fact is, most people think they handle objections with... Read More
Seems like everywhere we surf on the Internet nowadays we... Read More
What is it that makes you attracted to someone? The... Read More
How does one know when a relationship is really a... Read More
I'm writing this for women and for men. I have... Read More
Are you writing to someone who is romancing you off... Read More
The three most usual choices for what to do on... Read More
Jody's quest in finding a suitable partner for marriage seemed... Read More
Your dating site profile is the most important tool you... Read More
So, you've decided to take the plunge and follow in... Read More
Dating during the holiday season can be a special treat.... Read More
How can you tell if a somebody is interested in... Read More
The following no-nonsense list was compiled from interviews with long-time... Read More
In order for a typical woman to have sex with... Read More
Online dating is becoming more and more mainstream, as people... Read More
Dating online can be great fun, stimulating and exciting. So... Read More
Let's face it...some women can be ruthless. There are certain... Read More
You are on the first date with a girl you... Read More
Dating at an older age is not too hard. And... Read More
SpeedTry to picture what used to happen earlier in the... Read More
Carly's quest in finding a suitable partner for marriage seemed... Read More
We've all had that special woman in our lives. You... Read More
There is one thing we all know for certain when... Read More
In order to attract the man of your dreams, it... Read More
When dating we all too often settle for someone that... Read More
Every woman has a fantasy from the time she was... Read More
It's amazing how dating sites are helping over a million... Read More
Internet dating services are popping up online like dandelions in... Read More
However you like to do it, dating is a dangerous... Read More
I've been toying around with this technique that I call... Read More
Back in 2004, I met a gentleman who was interested... Read More
Has this ever happened to you? You're at a bar... Read More
Online dating is a new way to find friends or... Read More
One of my first "Big Dates" was a Cotillion dance... Read More
Dating mistakes can kill a dating relationship. Do you know... Read More
In the world of online dating misrepresentation is at an... Read More
Dating Dating |